assignment 11, my home at 12.

We had moved a little while ago. I looked at the white walls and noticed little cracks near the point where the wall meets the ceiling. But everything here besides that was so empty and lifeless.
The home I had known my whole life was now thousands of miles away and a place I doubt I’d ever get to see again. During the entire two week drive I kept thinking what an adventure this would be, to get another chance with different people. But being here I just wanted to go home. To my garden, my room with too many creepy spiders that I wasn’t allowed to smash cause they ate the ‘bad’ bugs, the dark creaky tiles in my parents bedroom made to look like a kind of dark wood.
I know no one at this new school. Not that that was ever different. But the people think differently somehow. It feels that way anyway. And like other kids they play. But not me so much.
Not that I care that I have always been too old for my age. My unpopularity follows me soon enough, as they soon learn that the new kid is not a cool kid to incorporate. In that way the kids don’t change. I count the good things in my day and the bad on my fingers as I walk home. The trees are big and blossomy like huge leaf bouquets. Lots of oaks with the strange seed pods that spin as they hit the ground.
When I come home no one is there. My parents struggle with their business and I no longer have someone to complain to when school is not good.
I lay on my bed and stare up. The ceiling has some kind of poky texture and I think of putting my hand up there and feeling all the little pokes jabbing at my skin.


7 thoughts on “assignment 11, my home at 12.

  1. I could feel your pain (assuming this is true). Kids can be cruel and utterly unconscious of the consequences of their actions and parents can get caught up in the river of life. It’s hard to be a kid that does not fit in. Hope you are okay now.

  2. new place, new environment, new people can be daunting for kids, growing up. I still have issues myself, now a days, as a grow up. Does not feel like I fit in, somehow. 😦

    Thank you for writing this post!

    • Thank you very much for saying this. For me being outgoing has never come easy. It is something I work at, but I recently realized that being myself is the most important thing and I hope that I will attract the right people for me on the way.

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